Help from other people - Asking help from others allows them to manifest goodness

Helping others is a virtue in all major ethical systems. Asking for help invites other people to be virtuous, and most people find this opportunity attractive. This means that most people want to help and will try to, if they can see a way to do it.

Help from non-professionals

Here is a surprising idea: asking for help is giving a gift to another person. It only happens when you value that person. And then there’s this: Making a simple, authentic request for help can open a connection of a unique sort with anyone you ask.

You can try this out yourself. Look for opportunities to ask for help, just so you can see what happens.

For example, suppose you in a fabric store and you’re looking for a certain color of thread. There’s another customer six feet away. You need only say to them “Could I ask for your help for a second?” Then ask if they have seen the color you’re looking for. Notice the response you get. You can try this several times with different people.

What you will see is that most people LIKE being asked for help!

When you ask for help, you assist them in helping you by asking if they know anyone they think you should talk to. We get referrals for specialist physicians - we can get them for specialist helpers as well.

Some specific helpful people you might consider:

Friends you trust, even if you have not spoken with them much about personal matters.
Relatives who you know to kind and caring, even if you’ve had little contact with them, or little contact in recent times.
Religious leaders in any religious congregation with which you have ever had contact. They talk with a lot of troubled people, and most have training in counseling of some sort.
Local government supported mental health agencies which exist in most states in the USA and in many countries elsewhere. Some are funded by regional governments and some by national governments.
Local hospital emergency rooms are always staffed by crisis care specialists who can locate resources for you or give you immediate counseling.
Hotline staff are specifically trained to deal with crises and to refer people to a wide range of local resources. Some operate at a national level and somer are local in their focus. Please see our Essential Internet resources page for a detailed listing of hotline and referral resources.

Help from professionals

You have basically two options:

Medical professionals: Physicians’ Assistants, ARNPs, or Medical Doctors can offer you medication, when it’s appropriate. However, if medication is to your primary way of dealing with a mental health problem, it may be necessary to consult a psychiatrist for a specialist assessment. Generally, ordinary depression and several kinds of anxiety-related diagnoses can be competently handled by medical professionals. But, the majority of people with depression are not seriously enough impacted to respond well to medication, and essentially all anxiolytics (anxiety medications) are risky for anyone with a history of substance abuse or addiction.

Some psychiatrists also do psychotherapy, but many do not. You will need to inquire about this. Psychiatrists are by far the most expensive psychotherapists you can be involved with, however.

Mental health professionals: Mental Health Counselors, Clinical Social Workers, Marriage and Family Therapists, Substance Use Disorder Professionals, or Psychologists might be right for your situation. These may be grouped into three categories:

Mental Health Counselors, Clinical Social Workers, and Psychologists all deal with DSM-5 mental disorders. Some are generalists, and some specialize. Research has not shown one category to be more effective than any other.
Marriage and Family Therapists specialize in marriage problems, and family conflict problems.
Substance Use Disorder Professionals specialize in substance-related (including alcohol) disorders, and often in other compulsive addiction-like or addiction behaviors. Specialization is common.

For help in finding a mental health professional, please see:

Finding a good therapist - How to solve this problem thoughtfully and efficiently

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page author: Tom Cloyd | reviewed 2025-04-20:2240 Pacific Time (USA)